ay before yesterday...
Yesterday...
Thus happened yesterday.... Mumbai was sinking... and well i was fairly dry... i some how managed to get on to a train from churchgate at around 5 pm... got off at andheri (e).... and no fucking rickshaw walla was reay to take me to sher-e-punjab...bastards... Anyways after a small rickshaw hunt... 1 guy finally agrees... but there was a clause attached "Saab metre pe nahi challenge.... bees (20) rupiya lagega"... I was more than happy... but as i enter the auto... there is another guy sitting inside... i thought 'Ok,,, maybe its the share-auto deal'...It didn't bother me and the auto rolled off... after a minute the guy besides me starts talking aloud in a typical UP-Bihar accent...
"Saila is mausam mein ek item honi chahiye,,, bas uska majja hi kuch aur hoenga"...sighs.... and then looks at me and says... "Kya kahena hai aapka?"
I am dazed... man what a way to begin a convo in such a shitty weather... i jus smile back...
"Arre,,,ekiidum...garam garam..pakaude or chai ki tarah honi chaiye item... bijli ki tarha... haina?"
"Hmmm..." i say.
"Aapki shaadi ho gayi hai na...?"
"nahi" i reply smiling back... the guy was drunk... i could smell it...
"arre kya baat kar rahe ho aap... apke to abhi tak duyi (do--2) bacche ho jane chaiye the... tssk...tssk..."
I smile back and say "nahi"
"Kya karte ho tum..."
"College"... i say...
"Kaunsa...?"
"Wilson college"
"Kidhar"
"Chowpatty"
"Aai salla..eeeeeetttnnnaaaa dooor....baap re...abhi wahi se aayi rahe ho ka.... itna baarish mein...?"
"Haan"
"Achi baat hai... par boss... aise mausam mein apni item honi chaiye... duyi minute ka majja uska ho jayega duyi minute ka majja mera bhi huyi jayega... arre 100 rupiya le-leve mujhse... arre paisa bhi kyun leve... uska bhi to ajja huyiga naa.... nahi... ye phair nahi ha bandhu haina??"
I nod back
"Ye ladki log bahut sharmati hain... pata nahi kyun...?" "Meri bhi item hai ek... flat mein rehti hai... ekdum upar walle malle par...haan... ekdum dhaasu chhez hai woh.... tumhare college mein do sau - teen sau ladkiyon mein awwal niklegi wo.... arre tum usko dekh kar flat ho jaoge... bas wo abhi yahha hai nahi...warna mein to....(does a couple of pelvic thrusts)
I am laughing...and so is the rickshaw driver... he tells the other guy to shut u... i suppose they were friends...
I was nearing my building so i direct the driver through the turns...
and the other guy starts off again...
"mera naam hai Rahul Malli... yaad rakhiyega...!"
I nod once again...
"Aap yahin kahin rehte ho kya... ?... arre kuch ho sakta hai kya hamara is ilake mein... matlab koi ladki mil sakti hai kya?"
"Nahi boss.." i say...
I tell the driver to stop... we had reached my building...
"ok bhaiya... kal miliyoge ka?...... kal milyogee kya,,,, arre kal apni item ko saath mein launga...bolo...kal miliyoge kya?"
I hop off...pay the driver 20 bucks...smiled..and said ..."dekhenge"...
Hah... funny things happen everywhere....
- Sahirr
Thus happened yesterday.... Mumbai was sinking... and well i was fairly dry... i some how managed to get on to a train from churchgate at around 5 pm... got off at andheri (e).... and no fucking rickshaw walla was reay to take me to sher-e-punjab...bastards... Anyways after a small rickshaw hunt... 1 guy finally agrees... but there was a clause attached "Saab metre pe nahi challenge.... bees (20) rupiya lagega"... I was more than happy... but as i enter the auto... there is another guy sitting inside... i thought 'Ok,,, maybe its the share-auto deal'...It didn't bother me and the auto rolled off... after a minute the guy besides me starts talking aloud in a typical UP-Bihar accent...
"Saila is mausam mein ek item honi chahiye,,, bas uska majja hi kuch aur hoenga"...sighs.... and then looks at me and says... "Kya kahena hai aapka?"
I am dazed... man what a way to begin a convo in such a shitty weather... i jus smile back...
"Arre,,,ekiidum...garam garam..pakaude or chai ki tarah honi chaiye item... bijli ki tarha... haina?"
"Hmmm..." i say.
"Aapki shaadi ho gayi hai na...?"
"nahi" i reply smiling back... the guy was drunk... i could smell it...
"arre kya baat kar rahe ho aap... apke to abhi tak duyi (do--2) bacche ho jane chaiye the... tssk...tssk..."
I smile back and say "nahi"
"Kya karte ho tum..."
"College"... i say...
"Kaunsa...?"
"Wilson college"
"Kidhar"
"Chowpatty"
"Aai salla..eeeeeetttnnnaaaa dooor....baap re...abhi wahi se aayi rahe ho ka.... itna baarish mein...?"
"Haan"
"Achi baat hai... par boss... aise mausam mein apni item honi chaiye... duyi minute ka majja uska ho jayega duyi minute ka majja mera bhi huyi jayega... arre 100 rupiya le-leve mujhse... arre paisa bhi kyun leve... uska bhi to ajja huyiga naa.... nahi... ye phair nahi ha bandhu haina??"
I nod back
"Ye ladki log bahut sharmati hain... pata nahi kyun...?" "Meri bhi item hai ek... flat mein rehti hai... ekdum upar walle malle par...haan... ekdum dhaasu chhez hai woh.... tumhare college mein do sau - teen sau ladkiyon mein awwal niklegi wo.... arre tum usko dekh kar flat ho jaoge... bas wo abhi yahha hai nahi...warna mein to....(does a couple of pelvic thrusts)
I am laughing...and so is the rickshaw driver... he tells the other guy to shut u... i suppose they were friends...
I was nearing my building so i direct the driver through the turns...
and the other guy starts off again...
"mera naam hai Rahul Malli... yaad rakhiyega...!"
I nod once again...
"Aap yahin kahin rehte ho kya... ?... arre kuch ho sakta hai kya hamara is ilake mein... matlab koi ladki mil sakti hai kya?"
"Nahi boss.." i say...
I tell the driver to stop... we had reached my building...
"ok bhaiya... kal miliyoge ka?...... kal milyogee kya,,,, arre kal apni item ko saath mein launga...bolo...kal miliyoge kya?"
I hop off...pay the driver 20 bucks...smiled..and said ..."dekhenge"...
Hah... funny things happen everywhere....
- Sahirr
posted by THE WILSONITE @ 8:48 PM
4 Comments:
At 10:59 PM,
THE WILSONITE said…
thats some insane stuff dude,
i would have loved to have lissend to that shit first hand!!!
vinayak
At 11:08 PM,
THE WILSONITE said…
You would have been weeping about 'not being comfortable' if you had experienced that first hand vinayak... and you knows it.. hahahahah
I think it would be apt to bestow upon Sahirr City the title of Freak Magnet
KP
At 2:47 PM,
THE WILSONITE said…
hey sahirr dude at write something that actually makes sense and not some stupid experience u had with this guy it kinda projects a wrong picture u know.and i totally agree with vinayak it would have been totally ...... if u would have given us a first hand experience.
from a very concerned classmate
At 11:13 PM,
THE WILSONITE said…
wat shit...mr concerned classmate.... pls cum n talk 2 me personally...v can thus discuss at lenght ur genuine concerns towards my acts...
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